Lent

I have been eyeing this NO JUNK FOOD CHALLENGE for a while...

and you know I just haven't done it. I always say I'll start on another day or that would just be way too hard.

I would like to see the difference though. And Instead of just 21 days I would like to do it for Lent. Last year for Lent I gave up sweets... very general. But I did it! Most of the things on the list were things included in the "sweets" that I gave up. I already decided not to eat fast food at the beginning of last year, and man I wish I would have kept up with that. At the end of 2010 I noticed I was picking up fast food pretty often. I'm fine without it, but after you eat it once a week or a few times a month the habit becomes easy to get it a couple times a week. Fast food just has so many calories and fat... and sodium and everything that is bad for you. There are better choices than others but when you're at McDonald's you would probably pick the fries over apple slices as your side. And pop just tastes so good with that food. I love pop and that was another thing I had just given up at the beginning of last year. But before Lent I still ate candy all the time. There were no changes in my body. When I drink pop I have one, when I eat candy I consume so many more calories than I would in one pop. Pop still isn't that good for you, but it was just silly that I thought oh I gave up fast food and pop (which are way easier for me to give up than candy) but continued to eat candy. Candy is like a drug for me. I am seriously like a crack addict when I say I'll quit and don't even get halfway through the day without caving in.

We always seem to have a reason why we can't quit eating bad food. Our lives' seem to revolve around food. Holidays... any celebration... stress... even sad events. We always have to have food! It's one of the things we can afford to enjoy ourselves. It's how we think we are showing love, it's what brings us together often.

But I can change all that for myself. Being healthy takes a little more preparation. And you have to say no. Or make the best choices you can in certain situations.

"Lent is a season of soul-searching and repentance. It is a season for reflection and taking stock."

When I gave up sweets for Lent last year it was more of a commitment. Someone recently asked me why not do it for myself. Which I do want to do it for myself... but it felt like I could give up sweets for Jesus because he gave up so much more for us. This year I would also like to learn more about Lent. I have been trying to find a church as well. I don't know that much about religion and the stories in the bible.

From some of the things I am reading on the internet it seems that some people don't understand why Christians give something up for Lent. It is about self-discipline and the abstinence of something should be a sacrifice. It isn't supposed to be easy.

The quote above is important to me and what I would like to give up because I do feel that I have an addiction to sweets and I don't understand why I eat so much candy and always want it. I know it tastes good and everything. A lot of people eat sweets.

• Sometimes I eat and eat candy because I think it tastes so good.
• Sometimes I eat and eat candy because I say I'm not going to eat it anymore and I need to get rid of it.
•  (I have more recently thrown candy away when I say I'm not going to eat it anymore, but then the next day or so I'm getting more)
• I have noticed that sometimes when I'm just eating and eating the candy I feel bad/ashamed that I did it, and I know I am eating a feeling of stress or unhappiness. Knowing that I ate so much candy along with how it effects my weight makes me feel so bad and so mad at myself.

It really is a habit as well. Once I completely stop I am okay. If I give myself enough time to make not eating candy a habit I can think about it more if I crave it and say no. Lately I just haven't given myself enough of a chance. Candy is something I need to just stop. I haven't found the happy medium or any kind of balance with it. I always eat too much.

But for Lent I will be soul-searching and reflecting.. why I can't control myself with candy and what really makes me happy. I want to explore what I would like to do in life. I will be focusing on my half marathon and getting fit. There are many things I would like to do to organize my house and projects I would like to complete. There are many things I need to focus on in my life and maybe candy has been an escape. I may need to accept the fact that I may not be able to eat candy. I love cookies, cake, brownies and ice cream as well. But I just don't over do it as much with those as I do with candy. Candy is small and easy to access.

Sundays are skipped in the Lent season and not counted in the 40 days. So I may have ice cream with my husband on Sundays or choose one thing that I cannot have. But probably not candy. I'm definitely not strong enough and I don't think I'll find that happy medium or balance any time soon. I haven't seemed to find that balance for the past 26 years!

Anyone giving anything up for Lent?